Remembering Lyn and wishing we could speak once more

I really miss my friend, mentor, and first HPS*, Lyn Benoit Goodnight.

What I'd really love to do is sit down with her – or, failing that, have an online conversation with her – and get her reaction to what is happening now with the Trump presidency and the daily disruption on so many levels that is occurring.

Pretty sure I'd already know what she would say about all of it. But I'd give anything to spend time with her talking, laughing, and getting her opinion on many events.

Miss you, Lyn. Still cannot believe you're gone :(. She would've graduated this month with her Ph.D. So tragic.

* High Priestess

Life gets in the way

Lyn and Nate had planned to move back to Colorado Springs and were in the process of getting everything set to do so. That's when Lyn died on August 8, 2016.

Both Paul and I want to remember and honor Lyn's memory, but we can't leave town and drive four hours, total, to go to La Veta for only an hour or two this coming Saturday for her memorial. I feel awful about it. We were trying to go, and had actually canceled out on being volunteers for Colorado Springs Comic Con, but life is such that things just aren't going to work out.

I have a full work queue this weekend (which I am GRATEFUL for) and we can't drive the RV all those miles until we get our fuel pump and brakes fixed. People have offered us rides, but we can't do that because they want us to ride down on Friday, spend the night, and stay on Saturday for the memorial, then drive back here. With the dogs, we can't be gone that long. Britt can't have them in her apartment, and she can't leave her dogs and stay in our RV for all that time.

To find an alternative to honor Lyn's memory, I talked with her daughter, Angie, and the plan is to have a small, casual get-together at Britt's apartment sometime over the next week or so where we can all come together, remember Lyn, light candles and incense, and share stories and memories of her. I'm sure Lyn would be happy with that.

No matter what we plan here, all I know is that she will never be forgotten and I am grateful for her influence in my life. She left far too soon, but she will always be remembered fondly.

Straight outta Covington, VA.

Though I consider Colorado my home, I was born in Covington, VA. 

Here's a pic of me and my dad. He died October 30, 1971. Miss him daily.

Love you, Dad!

On a day when your whole life changes...

Let me tell you a story. It'll be worth it, I think. It's a real-life example of how your life can change in an instant. On this day in May 2001, I left for work. It was my first day at a second job (I still freelanced).

We had one car and my then-husband was due to pick me up at 4:30 p.m. He was never late, but this time he was. My phone had been off all day because we were in training. Something told me -- intuition, I suppose -- to turn it on. At that instant, it rang. It was the police, telling me I had to come home because there'd been an accident. I panicked, thinking one of the kids had been injured. "I can't," I told them. "My husband has the car. He should be here soon."

He wouldn't be there soon, because eventually my hysteria forced the police caller to tell me that my then-husband, Gary, was dead from an accident. At that moment, my world turned upside down. Like in the movies, everything slowed down and seemed surreal. I ran back into the office, screaming. The entire place heard my shock and agony. And that's what happened 14 years ago on this date in 2001.

That morning when I left for work, I had been married almost 16 years and had two children, ages 8 and 11. By that afternoon, I was a widow with two children and $160 in the bank...and no life insurance. I didn't figure we'd need it because we were relatively young. Boy, was I wrong.

So, yeah. There are many other details and stories in relation to that sudden life change and how it affected our lives, but I think you get the point I'm trying to make. Actually, there are two: I want you to know shit happens that you never saw coming. Two, I want to acknowledge that this date will always be a sore spot for me and my children. You can't erase the past or the pain. The wounds scar over, but when they get picked at, they hurt again.

Today is always a rough day for my kids, Brittany Elizabeth​ and Jonathan Porter​. I want them to know that if I could take their pain away, I would. I lost my dad before I turned 7 years old. It's hard growing up without a father. And having a mother who tries to be both doesn't work all the time. I love both you guys more than life itself. It's not fair or right. I would not wish what happened to our family on anyone else -- not even my worst enemy.

Finally, I want to thank Paul T. Sninchak​ for becoming the stepdad to my two children ten years ago this year. It's been a challenge for him, but he loves them so very much.

I adore my family. But I wish there are some things about history I could change. Life isn't fair and it can -- and does -- change in an instant. Trust me...I learned that lesson in the worst way possible, and so did my kids. Nothing is ever guaranteed.






I love you, my dear family & friends. Live and have fun while you can. Nobody is guaranteed the rest of today, much less tomorrow or beyond.

One week after her passing: ten things that remind me of my mom

Today marks a week since my mom Shirley passed away after a long battle with Alzheimer's. I've lit the candles on her remembrance altar every day the past seven days. Many thoughts and memories have drifted through my mind. Today I want to list ten things that remind me of my mom and the friendship I had with her. I'm so very grateful she raised me (I was adopted) and gave me an interesting life that included being a military brat and traveling throughout the United States and overseas. In fact, that's how I ended up in Colorado! I love you, Mom! Herewith, the ten-item list:

1. Siamese cats
2. Small dogs (esp. poodles & chihuahuas)
3. Juicy Fruit gum
4. The smell of lipstick (her purse smelled like lipstick and was stocked with Kleenex)
5. Her homemade pizza; in fact, her incredible homemade cooking!
6. Her CB handle in the '70s—Wonder Woman.
7. Red. It was her favorite color!
8. Ice cream. She LOVED it!
9. Long John Silver's. When I visited her in Oklahoma, we usually picked up food from LJS. Mainly because we both loved it and there's no LJS restaurant here in the Springs. Hush puppies—yum!
10. Virginia. The place she was born and, despite all of her travels, the place she always wanted to come back to.

Of course, there are many other things that remind me of my mom, but I wanted to share several of them today. Those of you who knew her will probably recognize some of these things.