Not asleep yet. So many emotions. Third friend/classmate in three years who's taken his own life. Troubled. I'm so troubled. Full of sadness and frustration.
Life is hard. It's so freaking hard! I know this because the past four years have been HELL for us in this family. There are times when I haven't wanted to get out of bed or even wake up the next day and face another day of b.s. and soul-crushing challenges. But nobody ever promised me that life would be easy, and although it's rough terrain, I have no idea what awaits me over the next mountain pass (so to speak) and I'm not giving up on this journey until I see what the next roadside attraction is.
I don't know what YOUR b.s. and soul-crushing challenges are, but every day IS another day...and all cycles end. Nothing stays the same forever. Some cycles are longer than others. Some cycles feel like an eternity (believe me, I'm in the middle of one of them!) I just know that, although it doesn't seem like it right now, you CAN make it and you CAN get past these things you're dealing with.
Please, please listen to me: I can't do much, but if you are having a hard time and you need to talk to someone -- if you're to the point of NO RETURN -- please get in touch with me or at least talk to someone...please reach out...please don't cross that line of no return. Okay? Please do this for me, friend? Here is a number you should write down and put where you have it at all times. Memorize it or do whatever...just USE it, if need be:
1 (800) 273-8255
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline
Hours: 24 hours, 7 days a week
Languages: English, Spanish
Website: www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org.
Life can be dark, painful, disturbing, and any number of other things. But think of life as a book full of chapters, full of pages, full of plot twists. You are the author. You are writing this book. You can't control everything, but you can control your part and how you react or act upon things.
Look, I can be blunt at times and come off as an a-hole at other times, but deep inside, I'm really not. You matter. You freaking matter, okay? Believe it. Know it. We have more laughs to share here...and if I haven't offended you yet, then you HAVE to stick around, 'cause I'm trying! *smile* Plus I have more dirty jokes to post and crazy stuff to share.
In all seriousness, you're gonna be okay. You got this. Promise. And if you need to lean on others to find your strength again, then take my hand...and someone else's...and someone else's beyond that. It's okay if you feel fragile, weak, worn out. You're human. We all are. And until you can find the strength to support yourself and stand strong again, there are those of us out there who will help you stand.
Reach out...my hand is waiting.
Showing posts with label human connection. Show all posts
Showing posts with label human connection. Show all posts
Wednesday, September 23, 2015
Monday, September 14, 2015
Do good for good's sake, whenever possible
Never understood why I end up talking to strangers about their problems under the weirdest circumstances. A depressed and nearly suicidal college guy was playing in WoW and was obviously in need of help.
Everyone ignored him and he said, "Well, I guess I should quit college and hang myself." Yes, he could've been joking...but a longtime friend and classmate of mine, Harold Hitt, committed suicide in August 2012 and it's haunted me ever since. I should've picked up the phone and called to see how he was doing. I should've done something...even if it didn't stop him in the long run and he killed himself anyway.
Another friend, Terry, committed suicide a couple years ago. I only knew him through Livejournal, but I'd been online friends with him for years.
Both of those events still haunt me. So when I watched this situation unfold in World of Warcraft, I couldn't just be silent and ignore him. So I talked to him for about a half-hour. Found out he was drunk and depressed, feeling like his real-life friends had abandoned him and were ignoring him.
Anyway, those are the basics -- but I talked to him, then another person joined in the conversation as well. The end result was that the depressed college fellow said he was feeling better, and that what we told him made sense, and that he was going to log off and seek out his friends and do something that made him feel better.
I'm not sure what will or won't happen. I can only be sure that I tried to help in some way -- as did the other person. Before he left, he told both of us that we seemed 'legit' and like decent people, and he thanked us.
I hope he has a better day tomorrow, and all days after that. I never want to hear about a person I know (or become acquainted with) committing suicide or being ignored when they're depressed.
I suffer from major depression, anxiety, and PTSD. Without my family and friends, I may not have been here to this day. But I am. And as long as I'm here, if I can do a good deed that helps someone else -- even if they don't know me -- that's what matters.
Do good for good's sake, whenever possible. It may save someone's life.
Everyone ignored him and he said, "Well, I guess I should quit college and hang myself." Yes, he could've been joking...but a longtime friend and classmate of mine, Harold Hitt, committed suicide in August 2012 and it's haunted me ever since. I should've picked up the phone and called to see how he was doing. I should've done something...even if it didn't stop him in the long run and he killed himself anyway.
Another friend, Terry, committed suicide a couple years ago. I only knew him through Livejournal, but I'd been online friends with him for years.
Both of those events still haunt me. So when I watched this situation unfold in World of Warcraft, I couldn't just be silent and ignore him. So I talked to him for about a half-hour. Found out he was drunk and depressed, feeling like his real-life friends had abandoned him and were ignoring him.
Anyway, those are the basics -- but I talked to him, then another person joined in the conversation as well. The end result was that the depressed college fellow said he was feeling better, and that what we told him made sense, and that he was going to log off and seek out his friends and do something that made him feel better.
I'm not sure what will or won't happen. I can only be sure that I tried to help in some way -- as did the other person. Before he left, he told both of us that we seemed 'legit' and like decent people, and he thanked us.
I hope he has a better day tomorrow, and all days after that. I never want to hear about a person I know (or become acquainted with) committing suicide or being ignored when they're depressed.
I suffer from major depression, anxiety, and PTSD. Without my family and friends, I may not have been here to this day. But I am. And as long as I'm here, if I can do a good deed that helps someone else -- even if they don't know me -- that's what matters.
Do good for good's sake, whenever possible. It may save someone's life.
Thursday, February 26, 2015
No room for racism; we are all connected
Wonder if racists ever realize how ignorant and uneducated they sound? Whenever I read a racist comment on an article (usually one about President Obama!), I automatically think, "Wow, that person has issues...and they're stupid to boot." The race you should be concerned about is the HUMAN race. We are all connected. It's easy to see this if you find out about your ancestral DNA. Once you realize how connected you are through your DNA to other parts of the world, you realize that there is no 'them or us.' It's all WE.
Here's an example:
According to my DNA, the oldest female in my maternal haplogroup can be traced back to the Middle East, particularly in the Fertile Crescent.
The site states, "The haplogroup continues to have a strong presence in the region today, comprising about 10-20% of the populations of Iraq, Iran, Syria and Palestine, and 25% of the population of the Arabian peninsula."
Haplogroup: J1, a subgroup of J
Age: more than 38,000 years
Region: Europe, Near East
Example Populations: British, Scandinavians
The Vikings carried J1 from Britain to Norway and Iceland.
Highlight: J1 spread from the Middle East all the way to Iceland."
Here's an example:
According to my DNA, the oldest female in my maternal haplogroup can be traced back to the Middle East, particularly in the Fertile Crescent.
The site states, "The haplogroup continues to have a strong presence in the region today, comprising about 10-20% of the populations of Iraq, Iran, Syria and Palestine, and 25% of the population of the Arabian peninsula."
Haplogroup: J1, a subgroup of J
Age: more than 38,000 years
Region: Europe, Near East
Example Populations: British, Scandinavians
The Vikings carried J1 from Britain to Norway and Iceland.
Highlight: J1 spread from the Middle East all the way to Iceland."
* Source: 23andme.com
As I've said before, we are all connected. Yes, I'm American. But if not for my ancestors in other parts of the world, I wouldn't EXIST today. Think about the human connections. I'm over 98% Northern European (Scotland, Wales, Ireland, Norway/Scandinavia). But J1 made it out of the Middle East THOUSANDS of years ago and then spread to other parts of the world.
So when you speak of 'those people' in Africa, the Middle East, Asia, or anywhere else, you should first think about the origins of the human race and how we all came to be. Again, your concern should be with the HUMAN race. We are all in this together. If we don't start acting like it, there will BE no more human race.
One more thing: TRAVEL. If you've never been overseas or to another country, DO IT. I find people who've never been outside the U.S. are sometimes the most xenophobic and ignorant of all.
Anti-semitism is also ridiculous. I've never understood hatred of the Jews. My literary agent of ten years, Meredith Bernstein of the Meredith Bernstein Agency in NYC, is Jewish. She's also brilliant and has always been kind to me. My son was often mistaken for being Jewish when he lived in NYC because his name is Jonathan, which is apparently a popular male Jewish name. He dated several Jewish girls, too. I don't get the whole anti-semitic thing. Never have, never will. To me, when people make anti-semitic comments online, it always ends up sounding like jealousy. To be honest, there have been times when I wish I were Jewish.
My tolerance for racists or anti-semites is about as low as for pedophiles, rapists, and murderers -- ZERO. If you want to get the cold shoulder from me or be outright ignored, say something racist or anti-semitic. Chances are, I'll unleash verbal napalm on you first, though.
Folks, it's the 21st century. Time to grow up! There's NO place for such attitudes in our society. They only serve to divide us into them vs. us. Then it makes things much easier to do awful things to those 'other' people who look different from us or live in a different country. After all, then you don't see them as people like you or me; instead, they're objects or things and not people with families, lives, history, etc. That's not only sad, it's senseless as well. Time to evolve!
As I've said before, we are all connected. Yes, I'm American. But if not for my ancestors in other parts of the world, I wouldn't EXIST today. Think about the human connections. I'm over 98% Northern European (Scotland, Wales, Ireland, Norway/Scandinavia). But J1 made it out of the Middle East THOUSANDS of years ago and then spread to other parts of the world.
So when you speak of 'those people' in Africa, the Middle East, Asia, or anywhere else, you should first think about the origins of the human race and how we all came to be. Again, your concern should be with the HUMAN race. We are all in this together. If we don't start acting like it, there will BE no more human race.
One more thing: TRAVEL. If you've never been overseas or to another country, DO IT. I find people who've never been outside the U.S. are sometimes the most xenophobic and ignorant of all.
Anti-semitism is also ridiculous. I've never understood hatred of the Jews. My literary agent of ten years, Meredith Bernstein of the Meredith Bernstein Agency in NYC, is Jewish. She's also brilliant and has always been kind to me. My son was often mistaken for being Jewish when he lived in NYC because his name is Jonathan, which is apparently a popular male Jewish name. He dated several Jewish girls, too. I don't get the whole anti-semitic thing. Never have, never will. To me, when people make anti-semitic comments online, it always ends up sounding like jealousy. To be honest, there have been times when I wish I were Jewish.
My tolerance for racists or anti-semites is about as low as for pedophiles, rapists, and murderers -- ZERO. If you want to get the cold shoulder from me or be outright ignored, say something racist or anti-semitic. Chances are, I'll unleash verbal napalm on you first, though.
Folks, it's the 21st century. Time to grow up! There's NO place for such attitudes in our society. They only serve to divide us into them vs. us. Then it makes things much easier to do awful things to those 'other' people who look different from us or live in a different country. After all, then you don't see them as people like you or me; instead, they're objects or things and not people with families, lives, history, etc. That's not only sad, it's senseless as well. Time to evolve!
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