On the Cusp of the Big 5-0

It's now December 16th. My last day of being 49 years old. What a trip!

I used to think 30 was old, and I in NO WAY feel like I'm turning 50 tomorrow, on Wednesday. That's a half-century old!

Where did the time go, I ask?

Ah, well. I've learned a lot of things, made plenty of mistakes, had tons of laughs, cried a whole bunch, and met a lot of interesting people along the way.

I'm ready for my next 50 years, please and thank you benevolent (yet sometimes challenging) Universe.

I heard if you haven't grown up by the time you're 50, you don't have to. A good thing, since I wasn't planning on it anyway! *cackle*

Dealing with PTSD and Generalized Anxiety Disorder--Overwhelmed by Human Interaction

I joined a FB group for those, like me, who have Post-traumatic Stress Disorder (I was diagnosed by a psychiatrist in summer of 2006). Sadly, the group only causes more anxiety and agitation for me, so I had to remove myself. It was too much to deal with. Lots of overwhelming, intense posts and many upsetting ones that acted as triggers.

This is why I wouldn't want to do group therapy--because when people are in pain and hurting, it impacts me so much on the inside (though I may not show it on the outside), that my anxiety disorder kicks in, along with the nasty PTSD side effects, and I end up feeling unwell. If I become too emotionally upset, I get sick because my system gets so run down from it all.

So, if I ever tell you, "I am not ready to talk about this right now," or, "I have to sit with this; I'll get back to you later," please don't push me. There's a reason why I tell you those things. Respect my boundaries and wishes, just as I would do for you.

And while I do meditate, practice breathing, and do other things to assist with managing my Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD) and PTSD, it takes much more than those things to treat my issues. Simplistic advice for complex problems doesn't wash, especially when you aren't me and you don't know all the facts or backstory/history.

My Three Blogs: Pick and Choose

I have three main blogs. Two are primarily related to writing (the oldest blog was established in 2005). In addition, I also have a personal blog.

For writing, reading, book info, and editing tips, go to http://intrepidwordslinger.wordpress.com
or  http://elementalmusing.blogspot.com.

For personal posts about life, creativity, art, crocheting, knitting, and miscellanea, visit http://theredmistdescends.blogspot.com.

Read, comment, follow, please ;-)

If you have a blog, comment with the website address and I'll return the favor. I love reading other people's blogs!

I'd appreciate it!

[Dream] Cafeteria shenanigans

Last night I had another weird Trazodone-fueled dream. I looked into it, and Trazodone does give some people weird-ass dreams. They're so bizarre and disconcerting to some that people stop taking it. Not me, though. Strangely, I look forward to a new adventure every night.

Some dreams are more disturbing than others, but they're *never* boring. Last night I was in a cafeteria with my daughter Britt. The cafeteria was full of all sorts of food -- but it was weird, odd food. Strange colors, strange combinations, odd dishes.

Britt kept wandering off, which annoyed me. I'd turn around to ask her something, and she was gone again. When I went to call for her, I'd yell for Wendy, even though I knew her name was Britt. The name Wendy came out of my mouth each and every single time, and I'd go, "Damnit, I meant Britt!"

I told Britt about the dream and when I mentioned that I called her Wendy over and over, she replied, "Mmm...Wendy's sounds good." Lol! I have to agree with her. I could go for a Frosty right now.

Yes, I know it's not healthy food and all of that. I'm not completely daft! I still want a Frosty and a spicy chicken sandwich. So there! ;-p